Korean Restaurant Etiquette

Many Korean restaurants, especially barbecue spots and traditional places, expect you to wait to be shown to a table rather than picking your own. Once seated, a small ceremony around drinks and banchan (small side dishes) will take place that tends to arrive before you've ordered your main.

Confucian ideas about age and hierarchy still shape dining in South Korea, even among friends. If you're eating with a group that includes someone clearly older, it's polite to let them start eating first, and to avoid picking up your chopsticks before they do. The same applies to pouring drinks, more on that below.

Drinking is a social ritual in Korea, and inevitably there’s a specific etiquette to it. When pouring a drink for someone older or more senior, use both hands, or support your pouring arm with your free hand as a sign of respect. The same applies when receiving a drink where you should hold your glass with both hands, or at least steady it with your second hand, rather than holding it out with one. Never pour your own drink at a group table; it's considered a little awkward, and instead the custom is to keep an eye on others' glasses and top them up before they run empty.

Korean meals typically come with both chopsticks and a spoon, where rice and soup are eaten with the spoon, and chopsticks handle everything else. A few things to avoid: never stick your chopsticks upright in a bowl of rice, since it resembles incense offerings made at funerals, and try not to rest chopsticks and spoons in a way that clatters loudly against the table, which is considered a little uncouth. When you’re not using them, rest them on the little holder if the table has one, or laid neatly beside your bowl.

Lots of Korean food is built around shared plates. Barbecue is grilled communally, stews arrive with multiple spoons for the table, and banchan is meant to be eaten by everyone. Don't be surprised if a Korean dining companion serves you rather than letting you help yourself as it's a common gesture of hospitality, particularly from someone older at the table.

Soju, Korea’s national spirit, is everywhere at meal times, and refusing a drink can occasionally feel a little abrupt, especially in those more traditional settings. If you don't want to drink, a light touch to the glass or a polite decline is usually enough. Most people will understand as it's becoming increasingly normal not to drink at all. If you do drink, remember the two-handed pouring rule, and try to keep pace roughly with the table rather than falling noticeably behind or ahead.

Unlike many countries, tipping isn't expected in Korea, and in some restaurants leaving money on the table can cause confusion or even be quietly returned to you. Service is built into the prices here, and the way to show appreciation is simply to say thank you. "Jal meogeosseumnida," meaning roughly "I ate well," is a nice phrase to leave a meal with.

• Take your shoes off where expected. Traditional restaurants with low tables and floor seating usually require shoes off at the entrance. Look for a raised platform or a row of shoes by the door when you enter.
• You can ask for scissors. Korean barbecue and some noodle dishes are commonly cut with kitchen scissors at the table, so you can always ask staff for a pair if they haven't already brought one.
  • "가위 있어요?" (gawi isseoyo?) - "Do you have scissors?"
  • 가위 (gawi) - scissors
  • 있어요? (isseoyo?) - "is there / do you have?"
• Blowing your nose at the table is best avoided. If you need to, it's more polite to step away or turn discreetly, similar to customs in several other Asian countries.
• Loud slurping, particularly with noodle dishes is generally read as enjoying your food rather than as impolite.

It’s important to know that none of these customs are strict rules that will cause great offence if you forget something. Koreans are used to travellers not knowing all their unspoken customs, so a little effort will go a long way. But remembering some of the basics, especially around pouring drinks and respecting age at the table will help meals feel a little more natural, and might just earn you a warmer welcome the second time round.